This is the fourth installment of our “Love Lessons” column. Every week, we publish a mini-essay (100-250 words) about a single thing that can make or break a relationship. To submit your own entry, send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
So your boyfriend forgot to turn off the lights when he left the house and when you got home the cat wasn’t fed and the son-of-a-bitch forgot to make the bed? Get over it. Focusing on someone’s flaws will indefinitely destroy your relationship, especially if you’re consistently throwing them in your partner’s face thereby making them feel like a bad puppy that just had a carpet-abolishing incident.
Now there’s some, shall we say, personality flaws that are simply unforgivable (i.e. anything that involves abuse, cheating, lying, etc.), but if you can’t let go of the little things than you’re not being fair to your mate. And, truth be told, none of us are perfect – excluding of course Ryan Gosling and George Clooney.
Instead of focusing on how annoyed you are, try focusing on the positive — like the fact that your partner is comfortable enough around you to be themself. Plus, those dorky character imperfections are what makes your sweetie multidimensional and – let’s face it — pretty comical. – Cary Carr